Wonder of wonders, in this increasingly amoral society, there is a trend, a tiny trend, (among
teenagers no less) to abstain from sexual relations before marriage. "True Love Waits" is the theme of one such group, although others have equally catchy paradigms. The idea being that the greatest
gift you can give to your spouse is your virginity on your wedding night.
But I think this view is too narrow. I think the theme should instead be "Why Marry?".
And I ask that question in all seriousness.
Tax advantages, relief from condescending parents, the feeling that it's the thing to do, the fear of losing them if you don't,
pregnancy, loneliness, security... these and more are the reasons given by many (and felt by most), to whom "Love Waits" is a nice moralism but quite impractical. Why? Because when you're in love,
sexual attraction is easy to have, and sexual feelings and thoughts are hard to resist. To these, marriage is just a piece of paper needed by society but not by the two in love, for they know that
their love is real and do not need the approval of any institution to validate it.
Too bad for them.
But for a few, marriage is like finding a home that has been long sought after. It's a place, not a concept. It's a place where you're
accepted, faults and all. A forgiving place.
A place where you can pretend that you're the Hero (where you can rise above yourself for the sake of another). It's a place where your dreams can find a sanctuary. Where you are encouraged to enjoy
a frivolous pastime ("It's not a waste of time. It makes them happy. Let them be.")
For a few, Marriage is a place to grow only good things, to bestow noble deeds, and to treasure up kindnesses remembered. So that if sharp disagreement arises between the two, compromise is sought...
and found. If vice sneaks in (which is basically trading pleasure for innocence), it is discovered... and cast out. If anger erupts, so do tears, and forgiveness, and consolation... for Love cannot
abide to see its Beloved in pain.
Love heals. And Marriage is the hospital.
To these few, Marriage is much more than a social contract. It is a living and abiding picture of Real Love. To these, "Love Waits" makes all the sense in the world. It's what Real Love would do and
So why marry?
In all seriousness, you tell me.